You’re doing everything “right.” You’re successful on paper. You check the boxes, hit the goals, and hold it all together. And yet — you’re exhausted. You wake up tired. You snap at things you used to tolerate. You feel disconnected, irritable, unfocused. You fantasize about quitting everything, disappearing, or starting over completely.

This is high-functioning burnout. And it’s one of the most misunderstood mental health crises among ambitious, high-achieving women today.

We talk a lot about “empowering women” in entrepreneurship.

But if you’ve ever actually mentored a woman founder — especially one building something from the ground up — you’ll know that support isn’t enough.

Encouragement matters.

Representation matters.

But what moves the needle is structure, access, and belief rooted in real experience — not surface-level cheerleading.

I’ve worked alongside founders, taught strategy in classrooms, and sat across from women who are quietly carrying the emotional, financial, and societal weight of trying to build something the world wasn’t designed to support them in.

For years, women in entrepreneurship have been told to “be more confident.”

Pitch louder.

Take up space.

Believe in yourself.

And while the sentiment may be well-intentioned, the truth is this:

Confidence culture is failing us.

Because women are not underperforming because they lack confidence.

They’re struggling because the systems around them weren’t built for them to succeed — and no amount of positive affirmations will override that.

Let’s talk about why this matters, and what actually helps.

We celebrate the “firsts” a lot.

The first woman on a board. The first woman of color to raise a certain amount of funding. The first in her family to graduate, start a company, or run a team.

And while those milestones matter — deeply — we don’t talk nearly enough about what it actually costs to be the first.

We don’t talk about the pressure. The loneliness. The silence after the applause.

We don’t talk about what it’s like to finally get the opportunity you’ve worked so hard for, only to realize that no one ever prepared the space for your presence. That you now have to succeed while also explaining your value, justifying your decisions, and trying to prove that others like you deserve to be here too.